The life of a cowsama

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Oct 1
scottthepilgrim:

hotboysofficial:

the future is now

 jerk off your fork so it can give you spinnies

scottthepilgrim:

hotboysofficial:

the future is now

jerk off your fork so it can give you spinnies

Oct 1
abchannahxyz:

tastefullyoffensive:

After stewing in his emotions, emo veg comes to the conclusion that the root of the world’s problems is that people don’t seem to carrot all.[obvincognito/tabizine]

This is single handedly the best fucking pun joke I’ve ever seen on this damn website.

abchannahxyz:

tastefullyoffensive:

After stewing in his emotions, emo veg comes to the conclusion that the root of the world’s problems is that people don’t seem to carrot all.

[obvincognito/tabizine]

This is single handedly the best fucking pun joke I’ve ever seen on this damn website.

Oct 1

itsstuckyinmyhead:

Tumblr Puns

Oct 1
awwww-cute:

My mom got a new puppy

awwww-cute:

My mom got a new puppy

Oct 1
Oct 1
thisblogisnotgovernmentapproved:

thisblogisnotgovernmentapproved:

image

(Source: methhomework)

Oct 1

(Source: animatedtext)

poliakoff:

Now that’s a proper business hug.

poliakoff:

Now that’s a proper business hug.

(Source: andystjohn)

philsphancake:

synchronizedlameness:

guys, you know what this means??
google drive

People like you should be arrested

philsphancake:

synchronizedlameness:

guys, you know what this means??

google drive

People like you should be arrested


This is how I feel when I take off my skinny jeans

This is how I feel when I take off my skinny jeans

(Source: diegobendek)

(Source: de4thstarr)

mis4nthropy:

me: (worries about all the things I haven’t done yet)
me: (still doesn’t do them)

cryptofwrestling:

A genuine Richard Nixon campaign button from 1972..

cryptofwrestling:

A genuine Richard Nixon campaign button from 1972..

mujambe:

xxbecause-i-canxx:

hotmesswithouthehot:

lemonmintcoughdrops:

the-grudge-girl:

I live in Osaka, Japan and often use the subway to go to work in the morning. One day while I was waiting for the train, I noticed a homeless man standing in the corner of the subway station muttering to himself as people passed by. He was holding out a cup and seemed to be begging for spare change.
An overweight woman passed by the homeless man and I distinctly heard him say, “Pig.”
Wow, this man is insulting people and he still expects them to give him money?
Then a tall businessman went by and the man muttered, “Human.”
Human? I can’t argue with that. Obviously, he was human.
The next day, I arrived early at the subway station and had some time to kill, so I decided to stand close to the homeless man and listen to his strange mutterings.  A thin, haggard-looking man passed in front of him and I heard the homeless guy mutter, “Cow.” Cow? The man was much too skinny to be a cow. To me, he resembled a turkey or a chicken. A minute or so later, an obese man went by and the homeless man said, “Potato.” Potato? I was under the impression that he called all fat people “Pig”.
That day at work, I couldn’t stop thinking about the homeless man and his puzzling behavior. I kept trying to find some logic or pattern in what he as muttering. Perhaps he has some kind of psychic ability. In Japan many people believe in reincarnation, so maybe he knows what these people were during a previous life. I observed the man many times and began to think my theory was right. I often heard him calling people things like “Rabbit”, “Onion”, “Sheep”, or “Tomato”.
One day, curiosity got the better of me and I decided to ask him what was going on. As I walked up to him, he looked at me and said, “Bread.” I tossed some money into his cup and asked him if he had some kind of psychic ability. The man smiled and said, “Yes, indeed. It is an ability I obtained many years ago, but it’s not what you might expect. I can’t tell the future or read minds or anything like that.”
“Then what is your ability?” I asked eagerly.
“The ability is merely to know the last thing somebody ate,” he said.
I laughed because I realized he was right. He said, “Bread.” The last thing I had eaten for breakfast that day was toast. I walked away shaking my head. Of all the psychic abilities someone could have, that one must be the most useless.

HUMAN

HUMAN

SWEET MOTHER OF CHRIST

haha. that is pretty funny and very—- DID HE SAY HUMAN. for the TALL BUSINESS MAN…

mujambe:

xxbecause-i-canxx:

hotmesswithouthehot:

lemonmintcoughdrops:

the-grudge-girl:

I live in Osaka, Japan and often use the subway to go to work in the morning. One day while I was waiting for the train, I noticed a homeless man standing in the corner of the subway station muttering to himself as people passed by. He was holding out a cup and seemed to be begging for spare change.

An overweight woman passed by the homeless man and I distinctly heard him say, “Pig.”

Wow, this man is insulting people and he still expects them to give him money?

Then a tall businessman went by and the man muttered, “Human.”

Human? I can’t argue with that. Obviously, he was human.

The next day, I arrived early at the subway station and had some time to kill, so I decided to stand close to the homeless man and listen to his strange mutterings.  A thin, haggard-looking man passed in front of him and I heard the homeless guy mutter, “Cow.” Cow? The man was much too skinny to be a cow. To me, he resembled a turkey or a chicken. A minute or so later, an obese man went by and the homeless man said, “Potato.” Potato? I was under the impression that he called all fat people “Pig”.

That day at work, I couldn’t stop thinking about the homeless man and his puzzling behavior. I kept trying to find some logic or pattern in what he as muttering. Perhaps he has some kind of psychic ability. In Japan many people believe in reincarnation, so maybe he knows what these people were during a previous life. I observed the man many times and began to think my theory was right. I often heard him calling people things like “Rabbit”, “Onion”, “Sheep”, or “Tomato”.

One day, curiosity got the better of me and I decided to ask him what was going on. As I walked up to him, he looked at me and said, “Bread.” I tossed some money into his cup and asked him if he had some kind of psychic ability. The man smiled and said, “Yes, indeed. It is an ability I obtained many years ago, but it’s not what you might expect. I can’t tell the future or read minds or anything like that.”

“Then what is your ability?” I asked eagerly.

“The ability is merely to know the last thing somebody ate,” he said.

I laughed because I realized he was right. He said, “Bread.” The last thing I had eaten for breakfast that day was toast. I walked away shaking my head. Of all the psychic abilities someone could have, that one must be the most useless.

HUMAN

HUMAN

SWEET MOTHER OF CHRIST

haha. that is pretty funny and very—- DID HE SAY HUMAN. for the TALL BUSINESS MAN…

lifeoftroye:

tyleroakley:

radondoran:

THIS WAS ALREADY PERFECT

BUT THEN THE LYRICS STARTED

OH MY GOD